Day One — Reclaiming my wellness

I am Elyse Hocking
5 min readMay 27, 2021


The brutal and honest truth from a cheesecake addict

Photo by Max van den Oetelaar on Unsplash

Disclaimer: This article will discuss diets, calories, weight loss, body measurements, and the struggles and positives around these topics. If you feel this may trigger you, please do not read on. Sending you love.

Following on from my announcement yesterday [read the article here] that I would be starting my diet *ahem* wellness journey today, I can guarantee that I did in fact start and well, it’s been a mood that’s for sure.

Well here goes…

I had no specific diet in mind. I only know that that I had to start otherwise I’d never get round to it. I haven’t announced my journey to anyone I know outside of Medium because I wanted to remain mindful in the journey rather than insecure about others' perceptions of how it should be going. This is absolutely going to be bumpy, if you chose to follow the journey you may wonder ‘why did she do that or why did she eat that’ and you will be quite right in thinking it, because it may get a tad wild at times.

It’s absolutely going to be a learning curve for me especially in finding out what works and doesn’t work for my own personal physiology. And, maybe, just maybe, it may help someone else in a similar situaiton.

Photo by Marcos Paulo Prado on Unsplash

Diary of events.

7 am Wake up — I realized I hadn’t charged my Fitbit therefore steps, etc will be counted tomorrow. Migraine kicked in around 7:30 am. Normally I’d try to eat something but this time I was going to hydrate that pain away. Onwards to water.

8:30-midday — I started work at 8:30 (from home) and decided to kick start day one with a nice cuppa Earl Grey tea, boiled the kettle then realized I had no tea. Trying not to be disheartened I drank some bottled water and tried to not let it ruin my day. Nearer midday is when I started thinking ‘oh I’ll just go and get a little snack’ and had to mindfully correct myself, that those little snacks were the reason why I was having to diet.

The thing is I wasn’t feeling genuine hunger so I knew it was habitual — damn you Candida and your sugar messengers (candida thrives off sugars as do many pathogenic bacteria, the more you eat, the more they want which is why cutting out sugar can be hard). Instead, I settled for a Kenco Latte (84 calories) and get on with my morning.

Elyse 1 — Candida 0.

Midday — 3 pm — Have I ever mentioned I despise Coca-Cola? No? Well, I do. For me, it always tastes moldy? I’m not so sure why. So to reduce sugar hunger pangs, I opened 1 can and took sips because I simply didn’t want that attachment, drinking things that taste nice can increase your calorie intake, drinking things that aren’t so nice you’ll only take in what's needed. I know I could have used other lower-calorie options but the reality is, I have none in the house (140 calories).

The husband called me around 2 pm, he always asks what I’ve had to eat and today I told him nothing so far as I am dieting. He went on to tell me about a place in Edinburgh called Monster Mash that apparently serves yummy mash potatoes, sausages, and pies. Lord send me strength.

3 pm — 5 pm — I started to feel tired and hungry. Those 3 pm fatigue waves hit me hard and, I simply had no idea what I was going to make for our dinner. I made another Kenco Latte because I really enjoy them even if they are too sweet (84 calories).

It’s always difficult preparing two meals, where one must be far more calorific than the other. I’m thinking that reducing the carbs in my meals may be an easier way to do this along with giving my husband a larger portion size.

5 pm — 7 pm — This is the hardest part. The part where the bearded husband tries to stop himself feeling guilty for eating by offering me food or to taste food, or to discuss the weekend's meal plans. Usually, if I tell him I’m intermittent fasting he understands and will try to not mention ‘food’ so I plan on fasting midweek ideally from 6 pm or 7 pm, that way most of the fasting time is when I am asleep. For dinner, I opted for a Weight Watchers Free Food Chicken Tikka Masala frozen meal (360 calories) and Birds Eye classic garden mix veggies which contain a lot of vitamin A apparently (122 calories).

And, for a quick snack before fasting mostly because I was worried about my blood sugar crashing overnight I had a Timeout Wafer (222 calories) and a Skinny bar in mint (97 calories). I am aware I need to be opting for lower GI foods or slow-release foods for my last meal and not sugar, a work in progress for sure.

Total calories (My Fitness Pal): 1109 calories. [deficit]

Protein — 66 g [my advisory is around 51–52 g per day]

Carbs — 144 g

Fiber — 24 g [optimal for a female]

Sugars — 107 g (too high)

Fat — 27 g

Saturated fat — 14 g

Sodium — 955 mg

Vitamin A — 296% RDA

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Body measurements and starting points

  • Height: 157 cm
  • Starting weight: 64.7 kg
  • Goal weight: 55 kg (BMI of 20–21)
  • BMI: 26/27
  • Chest: 81 cm/31.8 inch
  • Waist: 79 cm/31.1 inch
  • Hips: 102 cm/40.15 inch
  • Thighs: 104 cm/40.9 inch
  • Left-arm: 25 cm/9.84 inch [estimated]
  • Right-arm: 25 cm/9.84 inch [estimated]
  • Left-calf: 33 cm/12.9 inch
  • Right-calf: 34 cm/13.38 inch


Today went better than planned if I’m being honest. I woke with a migraine, I was far more mindful with my end goal, my snack mentality, and simply when my body was thirsty or snackish rather than hungry.

I had hoped my back would have healed a little more today but unfortunately working (and sitting in my chair) has made it slightly more pained. Possibly the pain I’m feeling is diminishing my hunger? Either way neither is good.

Taking my measurements was hard emotionally. I am aware that I am doughy, that my calves are really quite large for someone so short but I was shocked by my waist and hips which have always been way smaller. My waist especially, there was only 1–2 cm difference from my chest and normally I’m more of a pear or hourglass shape. I feel I’ve lost my shape with the weight gain which makes sense why my health has deteriorated.

Onwards to tomorrow — this has to get easier, right?



I am Elyse Hocking

Blogger | Scottish life and personal opinion *All views my own* You can also find me at: